I graduated. Magna Cum Laude. December 2014. Nathan, too.
Life after graduation is different than I imagined. I imagined employment or scholarships offering us opportunities in someplace else, someplace new and probably exciting. Nothing terribly exotic, but something different, a visual and physical break with my undergraduate experience.
But I find myself in the same place, same apartment, wearing the same things, eating the same things, living with the same hand-me-down furniture as my undergraduate years. In two years, I'll probably find myself in the same place; if not the same apartment then the same quiet college town.
I can't help but feel that life has a way of being anticlimactic. Something "big" happens, the hulabaloo dies down in a matter of minutes, hours, or maybe even days, and then it continues. Life picks back up, and on you go.
Who knows what I'm looking for when these big life events happen? I think I'm searching for a pause button. Wait, wait, just a minute. Let's savor this moment, celebrate with people we love, and just take a small break to say yes! We did it! But life, especially my life, happens quietly. It really makes me reevaluate history, this awareness of just how quiet yet significant peoples' lives can be.
Monday, January 12, 2015
Rainy Day and Stuck Thoughts
It's a rainy day.
Not just any rainy day, though. The kind of rainy day where it's rained all day, and it's supposed to rain on into tomorrow. The kind of rainy day where the rain is persistent, and the monotonous sound begins to imprint itself in your mind, and your thoughts get stuck in a pattern like the rain drops.
Here are some of my thoughts that are kind of stuck right now:
--Being unemployed is boring and kind of scary.
--The worst part of unemployment is waiting for the process to unravel.
--Do I want to go to grad school in art history because it's comfortable, familiar, and I'm good at it, or do I want to push myself outside my comfort zone and try something new, take my life in a different direction?
--That GRE...
--Law school?
--Leah. Cutest missionary ever, and she's so happy. I'm happy for her.
--I just want to be warm in my apartment, is that too much to ask?
--Money. Ugh.
--Do I miss school or am I enjoying the break from it?
Welcome, 2015.
Not just any rainy day, though. The kind of rainy day where it's rained all day, and it's supposed to rain on into tomorrow. The kind of rainy day where the rain is persistent, and the monotonous sound begins to imprint itself in your mind, and your thoughts get stuck in a pattern like the rain drops.
Here are some of my thoughts that are kind of stuck right now:
--Being unemployed is boring and kind of scary.
--The worst part of unemployment is waiting for the process to unravel.
--Do I want to go to grad school in art history because it's comfortable, familiar, and I'm good at it, or do I want to push myself outside my comfort zone and try something new, take my life in a different direction?
--That GRE...
--Law school?
--Leah. Cutest missionary ever, and she's so happy. I'm happy for her.
--I just want to be warm in my apartment, is that too much to ask?
--Money. Ugh.
--Do I miss school or am I enjoying the break from it?
Welcome, 2015.
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