Sigh

I went to Lowe's one time, and I found this paint called "sigh."

Apparently, this really amused my mother...because I supposedly sigh a lot. I would argue that it's just how I breathe. You might be wondering why this post is called "sigh." Well, it's mainly because I've been sighing a lot more than usual due to the chaos that is life. It's how I deal.

And I just had the thought. I could totally write about that in a college essay. The one where they ask you what makes you "unique and colorful." I never really know what to write about those, although I think my religion and family size are pretty easy to write about. Considering that less than one-tenth of one percent of the world's population is Mormon, I figure it's pretty "unique."

College essays are making me stressed. Actually, it's more like the cost of college that's stressing me out. I think I have a few options. A) Suck it up and focus on getting into BYU where it's only $2,400 (or so) a year, B) try for a really good scholarship at an OK school, or C) just get into a bunch of debt....ugh. Yeah, I have a love hate relationship with BYU's tuition costs. For some reason, I really like these small, private liberal arts colleges that are $30,000+ a year. It's dumb.

Which is another thing--I've been using the word dumb quite a bit lately. I don't know where I got it from, although I know Clayton uses it. Hmm, maybe I got it from him? I decay.

I've been cast as Portia in Shakespeare's "The Merchant of Venice." My stage debut. I'm going Broadway all the way. Who needs college when I have an acting career ahead of me?

Me, too

"Look at all these books! I wish I had a rich uncle that would keel over."

--Ms. Friedman, in the SCHS library.

I'm pretty sure this is what I think every time I walk into a book store.

Knowledge

We were discussing something totally relevant to US History in APUSH today (yeah, that was sarcasm) and I zoned out for a while...then when I decided to zone back in, I heard my teacher say, "Just because you're innocent doesn't mean you're ignorant. I'm not any happier now that I know so many things. In fact I'm saddened by some of the things I know."

For some reason, the truthfulness of this observation really hit me.
I love knowledge and I crave it the acquisition of it, but knowledge can be so depressing. Knowledge has sometimes been described as the great equalizer. Why do we sometimes look down on others who may not know certain things, whose society may seem primitive to our own? I think this is more applicable to history as opposed to nowadays. Who are we to say that we are the better society because we're more "technologically advanced"? Are we really any better off than other cultures who don't have the conveniences of modern day medicine, our living standards, etc? The meaning of life consists of happiness and making others happy. Happiness isn't something that comes with material possessions.
Gosh this world is screwed up.
And the above paragraph was all over the place. It's difficult to find fluidity within my thoughts anymore. It's too spastic. Ahhh.


Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Join quiz bowl and become evil.

Wickedly Wondrous Words

Words are wonderful.

What I love the most about some words is how they can contain a whole concept within just a few letters. If that didn't make any sense, I hope the following words (and their awesomeness) clarify any confusion you may have. And if you do know what I mean by the previous statement, does it seem obvious? A discernible bit of information? Rather a stupid observation?

Tintinnabulation: the jingling of bells. It's six syllables long, which is actually longer than saying "the bells jingled", but it's extremely fun to say and type.

Beek: To bask or warm in the sunshine or before a fire. I had no idea that this word actually existed until today. It's Dictionary.com's word of the day. Isn't it fabulous?

Antebellum: before or existing before the war, especially the American Civil War. I think of Gone With the Wind.

Anachronism: something or someone that is not in its correct historical or chronological time, esp. a thing or person that belongs to an earlier time. I prefer to use this word in its adjective form, anachronistic.

Defenestration: to throw out a window. I like this word AND the mental image I conjure when I hear this word. Ha. Hahaha. (Although it's probably not that funny if you're the one being defenestrated. Is anyone else thinking of Prague right now?)

Orthoepy: the study of proper pronunciation. My reaction when first seeing this word was, "Oh my gosh, that exists?!?"

Vellicate: to touch (a body part) lightly so as to excite the surface nerves and cause uneasiness, laughter, or spasmodic movements. Once again, my reaction was, "There's a word for that??"

Confabulation: the act of confabulating; conversation; discussion. It's 9467 times more fun to say "confabulation" than discussion or conversation.

Premorse: having the end irregularly truncate, as if bitten or broken off. I imagine something (mostly a rock) with jagged edges, symbolic of a bigger idea.

Fantod: state of extreme nervousness or restlessness.

Do you get what I mean? Some words are more than just an adjective or an action. They're an idea completely embodied within a word, an entire concept expressed so wholly in a matter of several letters. They sum up so much so perfectly.
I love words.

Pretty Prosy Poem

"If all the world was apple pie

And all the sea was ink,

And all the trees were bread and cheese,

What would we have to drink?"

--anonymous

We have been reading a lot of poetry in AP Lit recently. I kind of liked this poem. Not sure why, it's kind of whimsical, but perhaps this is why I like it. Yesterday we read "The Flea" by John Donne and that was really...something else. We broke down that poem and peeled back all his fluffy language and dug our way through his metaphors only to discover that he was trying to seduce a woman using the analogy of a flea. Classy, John, classy.

Walton's Wise Words

My courage and my resolution is firm; but my hopes fluctuate and my spirits are often depressed.

--Robert Walton, from Mary Shelley's Frankenstein

Nothing like stumbling upon a quote that's very fitting in this time of my life and finding a fantastic Chirico painting to post on one's blog.

Busy Buying Books

I like bookstores. Quite a bit actually. I think it's sad I've yet to come across one since I've been in Tennessee. They're oddly comforting...they inspire a sense of awe. So many words, so many ideas, so much knowledge kept in one place. I want to read them all (except for the youth fiction crap/contemporary novels and the random biographies on Angelina Jolie and other people who are still living. What makes you think I want to read about their life? They're not even dead yet.). Reading them all would be amazing, but you know what would be even cooler? Buying them all. I'm really worried that books in print will become obsolete in the dystopic future, hence I feel the need to purchase as many books as soon as possible. Plus--books just look cool. Sitting on a table, a chair, a bookshelf, my bed. They're so ubiquitous.
It's simply amazing how some authors can manipulate the English language. I think....that the most important part of being a writer is being able to write well. I've never cared much for plots. Sure, they're there, but I really love the way authors utilize language to convey more than just a storyline. I don't have to relate to the main character or understand what they're going through to love the novel. I need to appreciate and respect the way the author has written the story. For example, my favorite novel is Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier. I can't relate a bit to the storyline (loveless marriages, murder, creepy house keepers, etc.) but I love the way du Maurier writes. Mark Twain, Charles Dickens, Emmuska Orczy, and so many others simply captivate me with the way they employ this language.
And so a love for reading is nourished.